Rude Awakening
by AmethystFox
Summary: Just a crack fic. Russia wakes up after a get together at his place only to wake up with a whole different get together in his bed.


Typical Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.

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Russia groaned and rolled over in his bed, the cool Egyptian cotton sheets feeling wondrous on his warmed skin and an unfamiliar weight on his thighs. He blinked several times as his head began to throb painfully.

Ah, he remembered now, the party. Last night, he had a few of the other countries over for a get together. America had been teasing him for a while about how about how he never tried to get along with everyone.

He rubbed his sleepy eyes and stretched a hand toward his nightstand. A bit of blind rummaging and he produced a half full bottle of vodka and propped himself up on an elbow to take several long gulps before looking next to him and nearly spewing his precious elixir.

There, in his own bed, in what he assumed was only their birthday suits, was a horrible sight. Well, at least one thirds horrible. Next to him laid Lithuania, sheets clinging to his lean form as he was turned away with his back to the Russian and his arms around….wait…who? He wiped his mouth and glared at the blond next to his servant and nearly leapt over the brunet to choke the other man until he realized who it was. He choked back what may have been a chuckle as the Canadian who resembled his older brother so much mumbled and kissed Liet's forehead in his sleep, His larger but still just as delicate body tangled with Lithuania's, both only half covered from the torso down. This was all well and nice to him. It never really occurred to him to think of Canada in such a way, but the view was indeed nice. No, the kicker that ruined this bundle of fun land was nestled between his thighs, under the sheet. His face paled considerably and he had to fight to hold back a large round of sobbing. There, with the sheet pulled aside most of the way was a female body. A naked female body, the long hair spread out over his legs. He stared and trembled, feeling where everything thing was that shouldn't be there. Gods above he could even feel her breath and lips on his….and why was he getting aroused! The sheet blessedly covered her head and face but he was still in deep shock. After a moment she shifted and groaned as she slowly woke and sat up, removing the crimson sheet that covered both her head and his nether regions. "B-Brother…." She looked at him sleepily and slowly smiled. "Oh, dear Brother, thank you for last night. I had waited SO long for your attentions…" she trailed off and slowly crawled up his body, glancing at his revealed nakedness and purring seductively. "Oh, but look Brother. It looks like we can play some more…" She was too close to his face now, and her hand had just touched little Russia when he bolted from the bed, tears streaming from his eyes as he Ran from the room, bottle still in hand. "! !"

Both Canada and Liet woke with a start and clutched each other, startled before looking at one another and backing away quickly. Liet bumping into Bela and Canada falling ass first to the floor. They looked at each other for a long moment in silence, faces flushed and eyes wondering before Canada oh so conveniently disappeared, mumbling a bashful apology and something about too much to drink and thanking him for a wonderful time. Belarus just shrugged and leaned against Liet "Boys, I swear…" It was then that the brunet saw her and hastily pulled the sheets back over him-self and courteously looked away. "B-Belarus…I'm terribly sorry I have hardly any recollection about last night at all But whatever we did…I swear I'll take full responsibility!" At this Belarus just reached over and twisted his arm painfully until she was quite positive she had dislocated the shoulder and roughly shoved him off the bed. "Stupid fool, WE didn't DO anything." From the other side of the bed Toris mumbled to himself completely ignoring the pain he was in. "Umm…Miss Belarus…Have you seen Russia? I could have sworn we were…all here last night." By now she was getting dressed and once she was done she walked towards the door. "I'm not sure about my Beloved. I simply crawled into bed with him this morning and drifted off. It was a bit warm in here so I stripped of course but when I woke up and tried to wish him a good morning he ran away." She paused and looked thoughtful for a moment. "I'm going to look for Dear Brother now…we must make plans for when we marry, marry, MARRY, MARRY, marry…." She stopped suddenly and giggled and left the room, leaving a very disturbed and disoriented Toris splayed awkwardly on the cold floor.


End file.
